Sunday, May 12, 2019

One-Seed Invertebrates

I am an academic, a book-guy, even a nerd guy, but I'm also a fan of sports, and sometimes conversations can be interesting that are bred from the idea of trying to rank specific things and then pit them against each other in a bracketed-ranking system, ala the NCAA basketball tournament commonly known as March Madness.


I was thinking the other day while at the aquarium what would a 64-member bracket look like if every entrant was an invertebrate? What would the top invertebrates look like? Who would command the one-seeds like the blue-bloods in the basketball tourney? Who would be the UNCs and Dukes of the invertebrate world?

This is just a silly waste of brain energy, but I was thinking hard about it, and these are my picks for the one-seed invertebrates:

Ants:

Cataglyphis velox ant



Some of the most aggressive and industrious animals on earth, the bio-mass of ants is equal to our own, which means there's a writhing pile of ants just as big as you, crawling around on this planet.

Octopus:


Highly intelligent, occasionally mischievous, multi-brained and spotted with chromatophores, octopusses are as close as anything is to intelligent alien life we can find on this planet.

Jellyfish:


Jellies come in as some of the most poisonous critters on earth and are one of the highly successful non-bilaterally symmetric animals, as in, jellyfish have no natural line of symmetry about which there are obvious biological reflective differences.

Bristle/Bobbit Worm:


Razor sharp claw/fangs round out this one-meter long ambush predator/nightmare. These are freaking fish murdering worms, one of the most voracious predators in its ecosystem---the sandy shallows of Indonesia and similarly tropical climes.

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Arthropods, cephalopods, jellies, polychaetes...I have a weird imagination that likes to link together things I think are cool, and then discussions come naturally because of the way someone like me thinks about sports.

I'm sure I missed something...let me know if anything seems glaring.

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